From the file marked ‘Please can I have a job at the Daily Mash… please… pretty please…’ we find a ‘Staff Reporter’ at the Sun getting the annual silly season off to a flying start:

Anti Alien’ hats for Wales

A US boffin has pledged ‘anti-alien’ hats to Welsh UFO-spotters after The Sun revealed how stunned police gave chase to a UFO over Cardiff.

The ‘thought screen’ – creation of US aircraft worker Michael Menkin – is claimed to protect people from being abducted.

Yep, The Sun is actually running a tinfoil helmet story somewhere other than in its ‘Sun Says…’ leader column and its a doozy, as it goes on to quote Menkin as having told The Sun that…

‘The people in Wales will benefit by making their own helmets.

‘Everybody would be a lot safer if they had one in the house. There seems to have been more reports (of UFOs) lately in Wales and Scotland and the western half of the British Isles’

Now, you might think that you couldn’t top that quote for comedy value, but wait… there’s more…

Margaret Fry, of the Welsh Fellowship of Ufologists, fumed: ‘I have seen UFOs, but I don’t believe in crackpot ideas like this.

‘It’s ridiculous. People in the Welsh Federation have been investigating UFOs for 40 years and none of us subscribes to this nonsense’

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!

FUCK ME!!!

Yes, you are seeing what you think you’re seeing – the woman who claims to have seen UFOs and has been ‘investigating’ them for 40 years is really calling the man with the tinfoil hat a ‘crackpot’.

Please tell me this story has been spotted by the ‘Mock The Week’ crew – as I understand it they record the show on Tuesday for transmission on the following Thursday and there’s got to be a half-hour show’s worth of material in this one story alone.