So sang the blithe reporter-man…

Anyone remember this story from a couple of weeks ago?


October 07, 2006
MUSLIM yobs who wrecked a house to stop four brave soldiers moving in after returning from Afghanistan sparked outrage last night.

The house in a village near riot-torn Windsor had BRICKS thrown through windows and was DAUBED with messages of hate.

Four young Household Cavalry officers who had planned to rent it were also the target of phone THREATS.

They were yesterday forced to look elsewhere to live — after top brass warned them against inflaming racial violence near the Queen’s Windsor Castle home.

It’s from The Scum of course – who could possibly fail to recognise their unmistakeable style even before one reads on to discover that…

Louts struck two days after the four arrived in uniform in an Army Land Rover to view it.

The source said: “A gang of local Muslims set about keeping them away. They hurled bricks through the windows and then wrote offensive graffiti across the front of the house.” The vile messages included one in 4ft letters on the drive — warning: “F*** off”.

Sources inside Windsor’s Combermere Barracks — where the officers are based — confirmed Muslims had made calls threatening the men.

Well, that clinches, it doesn’t? Sources inside the very barracks where the men are based actually confimed that Muslims had made calls threatening the men…

With news like that that, who could be surprised to find that Shadow immigation minister, Damian Green (MP for Ashford, Kent), thought that this was a "shocking development", while another Tory rent-a-mouth, Philip Davies, (MP for Shipley, Yorkshire) is reported to have said…

“This is outrageous…"

“If there’s anybody who should f*** off it’s the Muslims who are doing this kind of thing. Police should pull out the stops to track down these vile thugs.”

Strangely enough, when it was looking for comments on this story, The Scum appears not have bothered to contact the MP for Windsor, Berkshire, the actual constitutency in which this attack took place, which would be fairly normal practice… perhaps The Scum were a little less certain as to the reaction they’d get from Adam Afriyie MP.

There is, as the more perceptive amongst might have guessed, just one minor little problem with this story…

…its a pile of complete and utter bullshit!

‘No religion was labelled’ responsible for vandalism

Oct 13 2006

REPORTS that soldiers were driven out of a Berkshire village by racists have been disputed by Thames Valley Police.

In last week’s Express we reported that four soldiers returning from active service in Afghanistan had decided not to move into a house in Datchet.

Their decision followed the discovery of obscenities painted on the front of the house that they were due to move into in Montagu Road, Datchet, last week.

The soldiers also discovered that several of the windows had been broken.

An MoD source told the Express last week there had been phone calls made to Combermere Barracks in Windsor where the soldiers were stationed.

The caller said that the soldiers were not welcome because houses in the road are expensive – around £600,000 – and that the soldiers presence might lower property values.

Newspaper reports claimed that the obscenities and vandalism were the work of Muslims.

The report claimed this was the view of detectives investigating the incident.

Thames Valley Police have now said they are not pursing this line of inquiry. Detective Chief Inspector Stephen Reschwamm said: "This incident was reported in a national newspaper reports, alleging that Muslim youths were responsible for causing the damage to stop four soldiers moving in.

"I would like to emphasise that, although one of our initial lines of inquiry was to consider possible racially aggravated circumstances, we never labelled any particular faith or religion as being responsible."

He added: "Inquiries carried out to date conclude that there is no evidence to suggest that this was racially motivated. The MoD has also informed me that Combermere Barracks did not receive any threatening calls from Muslims or people claiming to be Muslims in relation to this incident."

So the actual story here turns out not be about roving gangs of Muslim youths victimising ‘our brave lads’ but about a bit of vigilante action by one of the local snobs who thinks that having ‘squaddies’, even the kind that have been to Sandhurst and serve in a premier cavalry regiment, living in their street will only lower the tone of the area.

And the views of the local Muslim community in Datchet on this?

Well who could say what the 35 Pakistanis and 5 Bangladeshis shown as residing in Datchet in the 2001 Census make of it all other to suggest that the very idea of a ‘gang of Muslim youths in the area in question seems just a tad unlikely as there doesn’t appear to be enough idenitifiably Muslim residents in the area to actually qualify as a ‘gang’…

…although maybe whoever it was who claims to have seen a gang of ‘local Muslims’ vandalise the house got a bit confused as it was actually local Indians who carried out the attack – there was 194 of them in the town according to the 2001 census and they probably ‘all look the same’ to the anonymous ‘witness’ whoever it actually was.

Assuming, of course, that this ‘witness’ doesn’t turn out to be the perpetrator of the attack and the story about the involvement of Muslim youths merely a lie to direct the attention of the Police away from those who were really responsible.

No, that couldn’t be right could it. Datchet is apparently only a mile or so from Windsor Castle and houses on Montagu Road, where the attack took place, are selling for something in the region of £600,000. These are hard-working pillars of the local community of good British stock, they wouldn’t go about getting involved in anything so tawdry as petty vandalism and attempting to pervert the course of justice, would they?

Still, seeing as The Scum’s as-yet-unamended-to-reflect-the truth article kindly includes an email address for the lead reporter, Julie Moult, I thought I’d take the time to point out that there appears to be a problem or two with her story…


Regarding your story about the vandalism of a house in Datchet, which you reported as an attack by Muslims seeking to prevent a group of Army Officers moving in to the area, presumably you’re now aware that the whole ‘Muslim angle’ to the story has turned out be a complete load of rubbish.

If not, then this report may illuminate matters for you –

[link to icBerkshire story]

– sorry it is a week old, but I’ve only just noticed it myself.

Given that the police have now indicated that the attack was not racially motivated and was not carried out by Muslims and that it appears that it was, in fact, motivated by ‘fears’ that the presence of solidiers in the area might affect local property values, which is probably not a major concern for the identifiable Muslim ‘community’ of the area that, according to the 2001 Census, amounts to a total of 35 Pakistanis and 5 Bangladeshis, are you now considering publishing a retraction of this story, or at least amending it as it appears on your website to reflect the informating that has emerged since its publication?


I await her response with considerable interest, particular having discovered this little report in the Media Guadian dated a mere two days after the Datchet story…

Veiled byline
The Sun’s Anila Baig could be forgiven for being a bit miffed this morning, and not just because passport control didn’t check under her veil at Leeds-Bradford airport. Her efforts to "reveal how shockingly easy it is to breach airport security – wearing a Muslim-style veil" is described on today’s front page as an "Exclusive by Julie Moult". Baig has to wait for her byline until page nine.

Curiously enough, while Baig’s story still appears on The Scum’s website, Julie’s front page ‘exclusive’ is nowhere to be found…

Should I get a reply from Julie, you will, of course, be able to read it here…

Oh, about the title of this piece, its by an obscure writer(?) by the name of ‘Barson Maith’ of whom posterity appears aware only because the verse from which the line is taken was included by Ambrose Bierce in his defintion of ‘Reporter’ in his Devil’s Dictionary.

A writer who guesses his way to the truth and dispels it with a tempest of words.

"More dear than all my bosom knows, O thou
Whose ‘lips are sealed’ and will not disavow!"
So sang the blithe reporter-man as grew
Beneath his hand the leg-long "interview."

                                                                                Barson Maith

14 thoughts on “So sang the blithe reporter-man…

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  5. julie moults brother is richard moult,is the infamous neonazi/satanist member of reichsfolk and the order of nine angles a.k.a. ‘christos beest’.
    google his name along with hitler or O.N.A. to find out more

  6. She recently did a piece about nazi racoons invading europe. The racoon wearing a nazi armband in the illustration looks a little like her brother.

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